On: Comparing Yourself to Others

How many times in your life have you been told to not compare yourself to other people? Probably once a week since you were old enough to even comprehend who other people are. We’re all told that it’s not okay to be envious or driven by other people but nobody talks about the reality that we are always going to be comparing ourselves to others. 

Human beings have the need to improve themselves all the time. We are always learning and being exposed to new things that change the way we think, act, speak, and present ourselves in general. This is because we are influenced by all of our surroundings. The strongest influence in our life is ultimately other people. The people around us have an incredible way of shaping the way we are without even trying to. In your life, I bet you have shaped the lives of thousands of people by just being you. Maybe you leave a waiter a really good tip and from that moment you turned their ho-hum day around and put them in a mood that radiated with everyone else they served that day. Your negative actions have shaped people’s lives too. For example, maybe the other day you dropped a piece of garbage on the ground and a bystander saw you do this and decided it was okay if they turned the streets into their own personal trash bins as well. You never know the way you will influence everyone you come into contact with. How many times have you been out and seen someone who appeared as an awful human being? Maybe they were yelling at a cashier or possibly they tripped someone on purpose and for the rest of the day you changed your actions because of the other people who influence you. The influence could have been positive or negative depending on the way you chose to perceive it. 

This goes the same for when you compare yourself to other people. We all know it’s an incredibly unhealthy habit to have but humans are creatures of habit and why stop now when we’re already so good at it? Let’s face the facts now. There will always be someone who is better than you. There will always be a more skilled writer, someone who is better looking than you, someone smarter, or someone with incredible time management. There’s no doubt that you have in fact compared yourself to every one of these people. Is it because humans are innately self-destructive? Or is it because we have a constant drive to improve upon ourselves? In reality, it’s probably both. There is so much pressure to not compare yourself to other people and just be happy in your own self but if we’re being honest, it’s not going to happen. That doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t compare ourselves to others, though. You can become the best version of yourself while still comparing yourself to other people. You can let your envy drive you into being the best version of yourself. For example, if you have a coworker who goes running every day at 4am, he’s probably an asshole and you are more than likely jealous of how self-motivated and fit he is. So because of that you start going on runs at 4am and as a result, you’ve now improved your health while also boosting your ego because of the awesome bragging rights. 

I guess my whole point of this is to say that comparing yourself to others is inevitable but you have a choice as to whether or not your comparisons will make you a better or worse person. It’s all about the way you perceive the world around you and the way you let others shape you. There will always be people who are better in some aspects of life that you just haven’t cracked yet but don’t forget that you have some special qualities, too. Ones that could make any other person jealous enough to work harder. 

Do you agree? Disagree? Let me know what you think!

On: Following a Dream

You have been told to follow your dreams and ambitions. Every movie you watch, book you read, or thing your parents tell you from ages 3-12 is how you need to follow your dreams because you are capable of anything on this planet. When you get a little older is when the pressure starts.
What college are you going to?
What is your major going to be?
What are you doing with your life?
That won’t make any money you should do this instead.

So when do we lose our dreams? At what point do you go from wanting to grow up and be a princess or archeologist and instead decide to become a bank teller or decide that data input is the career for you? At what point did you decide to settle? There are still people who are achieving their dreams every day. There are always new celebrities, new athletes, and scientists making discoveries but the fact is that most of us, never actually followed our dreams. Yes, these visions can change as we get older. We may go from wanting to be a world-famous soccer player, to owning a fishing boat. Those are also good dreams so why aren’t we achieving them?

Perhaps it has to do with money. The world that we live in is an entire culture surrounded by money. There is so much pressure to make enough money to support yourself and also have everything you could ever want in the world. The American dream isn’t as easy to achieve as it was before but it’s still the driving force behind most Americans. How often do you hear “well when I have more money…” or “If I was rich I would…” That’s because money has become the world that we revolve around. There’s never enough of it and that’s why we end up going for these careers that aren’t our dreams but pay the bills. Sometimes, the jobs don’t even pay the bills but it’s what we have to do in order to stay alive.

So how often do we dream? For some of us, we daydream all day long for others, we only dream at night when we can’t sleep. The matter of the fact is we are all dreaming. We’re always hoping for something better than what we’re living. I think it’s because our fantasies are what keeps us going. If we can get out of our heads for even just a moment and think about the possibilities of what our lives could be, the moment is blissful. It’s hopeful to think that we have more potential and could be living our best lives possible.

It’s also easy to shoot ourselves down when our thoughts get too hopeful. Well yes, you could sell everything you own and spend the rest of your life backpacking across Europe but how would you support yourself? Or what about your family? That’s just not something you can do. At least right now it’s not. Maybe in the far future you can think about it again. It’s possible we all tend to think this way because we believe we are not worth it. We aren’t worth our dreams and ambitions.

It’s also hard to achieve the dreams we want. These dreams can include a lot of money and planning and schooling that we don’t exactly have access to. It’s extremely hard to achieve our dreams and most of the time we’re just hoping for a lucky break that will take us where we want to go. These dreams are also terrifying. They can affect our relationships, uproot our lives and completely change everything we have ever known. So are we frightened of our dreams? Are we scared to shoot for what we really want? Are we worried of the repercussions?

I have no idea. Maybe we’re intimidated by our own ambitions, maybe they’re impossible or maybe we just aren’t ready to see the reality of our dreams yet. We can still dream, though. We can dream all day and all night and if looking up into the sky and wondering makes us feel happy and hopeful then maybe the thought is just enough.

So let’s keep dreaming. Let’s fantasize about our wildest ideas. Maybe the thoughts will keep us up all night or maybe they’ll bring us to blissful sleep. Some of us will achieve our dreams and live happily ever after. There may even be some individuals who achieve their dreams and it’s not all its cracked up to be. Others won’t quite get there but we will keep on dreaming. We will find hope and ambition within our pipe dreams. What you choose to do with your dream is up to you. Whether you get it yourself or pass it on to everyone around you. So here’s to all the dreamers, Whether you drive a racecar or you’ve explored every corner of the earth in your dreams no one can stop you.

How to take care of yourself first

With 2017 off to a rough start and bad news being plastered all over your Facebook feeds and Twitter timelines, it can be tough to keep yourself feeling well. If you combine this with the winter blues, sooner or later you will be finding yourself feeling less than great mentally and physically. Many of us have obligations outside of ourselves such as work, school, kids, people who rely on us and social groups who all constantly need our attention. It can be almost impossible to ignore all of our responsibility and take care of our minds and bodies. In fact; many of us don’t actually know how to help ourselves at all. We are so used to helping all the others around us that worrying about ourselves has become a foreign concept. We need to make self-care a reality. You are always willing to sacrifice yourself to others but now is the time you need to worry about yourself. It is the same concept behind airplane safety instructions, secure your own air mask, then secure your child’s. If you are not able to breathe, then how will you assist others?

While you cannot abandon all your responsibilities at once, you can take breaks from them where needed. A day off of work, skipping one committee meeting or putting your kids in front of a movie. This can be easier said than done for most people but here’s the reality: taking care of yourself does not make you a bad person. I believe that more people need to hear this so they can take a step back and do something for themselves. So how do you start to take care of yourself?

Stay off social media – Social media is constantly surrounding us and it can be so toxic to our self-care as it causes us to be stressed. The news is a large factor of people’s stress and we are nowhere short of bad news lately. There are also your or friends who always seem to be living a better life than you are. FOMO or fear of missing out can cause an astronomical amount of stress in our lives. While it sounds somewhat ridiculous, if your sister-in-law just got back from a service trip to Africa it may seem like you are not doing enough. You are doing enough so take a break from your phone and computer. I suggest staying off social media for at least one, full, uninterrupted hour a day. Your mind will also thank you for the break.

Feed your body now, worry about the calories later – The majority of people aren’t eating the right way. I don’t mean eating healthily but being mindful of the food that is going into your body. A study was done saying that 65% of workers either skip their lunch break altogether or work through their lunch. The rest of us usually eat standing up or eat with a smartphone in front of our face. Eating in this way can cause weight gain and malnutrition by not listening to what your body really needs. Take some time to yourself and really enjoy your food. If you’re not enjoying what you’re eating then eat something else! Life is too short to eat food that isn’t good. You need to listen to your body. Feeling a little fatigued? Drinking a big glass of water will help a lot. Also while it is important to eat healthy because it keeps your body going, it’s also important to indulge every once in awhile because it keeps you sane.

Relax your body – I bet if you paid attention to your body right now, you would feel some kind of discomfort. Maybe your head hurts or your neck is feeling stiff. It can be easy to ignore what our body is telling us as we get swept up in the trials of everyday life. A good way to relax your body is to get it moving. Our bodies were meant to move so if you spend most of your day sitting at a desk, you’ll find your body feeling restless and probably achy as well. Going on a walk or hitting up a yoga class can instantly make your mind and body feel better. You’ll also sleep a lot better at night. If you are feeling physically exhausted, taking a bath or doing some stretching will also do the trick. Even just taking a warm shower can relax your muscles and put your body at some ease.

Find a non-technical hobby – Doing something with your hands can be a great way to give your mind a break from stress. Don’t limit yourself in this area. Writing, woodworking, knitting or whatever might be your thing is very satisfying. If you’re like me and have never found a hobby to work for you, I suggest reading this book. It’s full of DIY ideas that are useful for your life and can be super fun. If you can’t decide on just one hobby, pick multiple! No matter what you decide to do, the time spent will not be wasted and you’ll be feeling some peace of mind in no time.

Do something for yourself that has been looked over in everyday life – This is a big one. If you are like the vast majority of people, you have passed over some self-care to do something for someone else. Think about something specific to you that needs to be done. Maybe you need to go to the dentist or just a good face wash. Things like this are very small but they are important. After accomplishing just one of these mundane tasks you will also find that you feel better about yourself for getting something done and because it was just for you and not anyone else, you’ll feel a little happier as well. When it comes to taking care of myself the first place I go is skincare. I usually use this face mask that’s basically a really big pore strip and is the most satisfying thing in the world to peel off

Just relax! – Whether relaxing for you means going on a run or just sitting down and watching TV, take a little time to yourself to just relax. During your relaxation, you have free your mind of any obligations or stress or else your relaxation will be useless. You can stress about making lunches later just take a moment for yourself now.
It is incredibly easy to stretch yourself thin and lose time for yourself. Take a little time every day to worry about just you. Even just drinking a cup of coffee to yourself can drastically change how good you feel. It can be hard to make real time for yourself but I promise that the results are worth it. By making a little time for yourself first you’ll be making more time for your other responsibilities as well. With a clearer head you will be able to make better decisions and accomplish more throughout your day. So whatever you decide to do, as long as you are taking care of yourself, you’ll be on to bigger and better things.

Beauties on Fire Collab!

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Hello everybody! I recently joined an amazing collaboration with a bunch of other beauty bloggers called the Beauties on Fire! Every month, the beauties on fire will focus on one theme and write a little post about it. This month our theme is 2017 beauty predictions. I will be posting my predictions towards the bottom but first, lets start with an introduction.

  • Tell us a little about your blog and why you decided to start blogging

Lately, my blog has been a way for me to express my feelings and has mostly been used as a means to vent my frustrations and thoughts into the world. I started it as a way to deal with my anxieties and throw my thoughts out into the world instead of just complaining to my husband all the time. I have found that I am better written than I am spoken so whenever I start to type, the words tend to find themselves. This is a nice alternative to the stuttering and use of the word “like” that always finds its way into my vocabulary. I am starting to re-brand my blog. I would like to branch out from my normal soap box and give something back to my readers. I would like to expand in a way that everyone feels as though they can relate to at least some of my posts. I want to start doing beauty reviews and tutorials. I also want to include healthy living into my blog as it is a very large window into my life. I would also like to incorporate some other fun odds and ends such as trying recipes, playing video games as well as the occasional rant that keeps me sane.

  • How long have you been blogging?

I have been blogging for two months. I love using my blog as a way to express myself and I feel a huge jolt of excitement every time I announce a new post is up. I am now looking towards other bloggers and finding myself through them. I have only been looking for new connections for a couple of days but I have found endless amounts of good advice and admirable writing styles. My hope with this blog is to create a community around myself where I can feel confident about the things that I post as well as explore all the other writers around me.

  • Do you consider yourself a fashion blogger, beauty blogger, or both?

I definitely consider myself more on the beauty side. Makeup is a strong passion of mine and while I would like to call myself a fashion blogger, I wear the same pair of jeans almost every day and my favorite outfit, Is a very nice pair of sweatpants and a cat on my lap as the accessory. I do however love to explore the different kinds of beauty I can do with my face as well as my nails. There are so many countless options and I have barely explored them.

  • List 3 things you love to do besides blogging

-I love spending time with my husband and cat

-Messing around with new makeup ideas and beauty hacks

-I love to read interesting articles such as the ones on Cosmo, Refinery 29 and Buzzfeed. I just can’t get enough!

  • What style of makeup do you enjoy the most: Natural, Trendy, Glamorous? Show us some of your best looks. Also, what is one beauty product you can’t live without and why?

My favorite makeup style has got to be glamorous! I love using anything that is shimmery, bold and anything with glitter is always a plus. I love doing makeup such as this because I feel like it so strongly represents my personality which is beautiful, bold and always glitters.

The product I could not live without is eyeshadow and concealer. My eyeshadow pallets allow me to express myself through countless colors and not to mention that shimmery eyeshadow is a way of life. I also love my concealer for all of the fun makeup tricks you can do with it. With concealer, you can achieve so many clean and beautiful looks with just a simple swipe.

2017 Beauty Predictions: Beauties on Fire collab January 2017

My first prediction for 2017 is that we will be seeing less harsh contour and embrace our natural face shape a little more. I hate caking too many products on my face and I’m sure many others do as well. Just a few couple swipes of a brush and you’re good to go!

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Another beauty trend I predict we will see is bringing back blush. With all of the hype over flawless contour and perfect highlight I feel as though blush has been left in the shadows. In 2017 let us all revert back to using blush to accentuate our rosy cheeks

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A beauty trend I would like to see happen is less harsh brows. Let your natural brows be on fleek! By brushing your brows and adding a little pigment your brows will be fabulous. I’m sick of seeing the “Instagram brow” all over the place. The look is nice in high definition pictures but in real life, they can come across as very brash and tend to look very fake. If the crisp brow is your thing, keep doing you, boo! I however, will be toning down my brow routine and letting these babies fly.

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This year lets say goodbye to matte eyeshadow and welcome back shimmer and glitter into our lives. We all need a little more sparkle in our step and the best way to achieve it is with sparkly pigments all over our eyelids. The matte trend was great and all but I never stopped wearing shimmery eyeshadow so let’s see it make a comeback in 2017.

A trend I would like to see stick around is highlighter. Highlighter is my most favorite part of my beauty routine because it’s great to see your face pop and shimmer. My hope for 2017 is that people will be branching out in their use of highlighter and find new places to apply it. I for one like to put it all over my nose. I also hope to see new colors of highlighter make their way into this year. We have a whole rainbow of colors so why stop at nudes? I want to see some crazy blue, yellow, or green highlight radiating off beauty lovers everywhere.

Another trend for 2017? Crazy colored eyeliner. Whether it be pencil or liquid I predict we will be seeing a lot of different colored eyeliners being used to make bold eye looks. Black eyeliner will always be a staple in everyone’s beauty routine but with so many options, we might as well try. Also: if you don’t know if you want to buy crazy eyeliner just yet, don’t fret because you can use any color of lipstick and a brush to achieve your eyeliner look. Just take a brush to your favorite shade and draw it on just like you would regular eyeliner. I’ve found that matte lipstick works best as it’s not so sticky. I achieved this look with my favorite Colourpop metallic lip and it gave me an awesome metallic line that stands out and looks fabulous.

Finally, I predict that 2017 will be the year of monochromatic everything. Whether it be your outfit or your bold face. I love the look of monochromatic because I love the ways that similar colors can blend together to create a cohesive look.

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So there it is! My predictions for 2017. What do you all plan to see make it’s way into 2017? Don’t limit yourself to make up either. Do you plan to see new fashion trends? New social media trends? Or maybe you have a prediction for all the crazy things that 2017 will bring us. Here’s to a prospering year full of new experiences!

Much love, Mady

If you would like to take a look at all my other Beauties on Fire you can find them here. All of these bloggers are absolutely amazing and I cannot wait to see all of our other collabs we will be doing this year.

How to: Make your own highlighter out of recycled eyeshadow

Hello all! I recently learned how to recycle my old powders (blush, highlighter, bronzer, eyeshadow) and turn them into something new and exciting: A highlighter! This process is super easy and I will walk you through the process step-by-step. Easy as pie! This was my first time actually trying this and the end result was absolutely amazing.

You will need:

  • old eyeshadows, highlighters, bronzers, blush, etc.
  • Rubbing alcohol
  • Eyeshadow pans (link at the bottom if you need some)
  • A butter knife
  • A round, flat bottom for pressing (I used the cap for my hairspray)
  • A small bowl
  • Fine glitter (optional but hello who doesn’t want to be a walking disco ball 24/7?)

Start by taking your old makeup and choosing what color you want your highlighter to be. I chose to make mine a dark pink color so I used the first and eighth color in my hard candy pallet as well as a shimmery pink and an old highlighter from my Ulta brand pallet. I love the colors in both of these pallets but they have gotten dry over time and use so I decided it was better to give them a new chance at life instead of letting them waste away on my vanity.

After you have chosen your colors, scrape the contents out of the pans and into a bowl. I chose to put mine into an old tupperware container so I would have a lot of room to mix all the colors together. At this point I also added some very fine crafting glitter. You can also use cosmetic glitter if you have it on hand but the whole point of this post is to save some money and use your cosmetics for all they are worth.

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After you have emptied the contents into a bowl, mix them around with the butter knife to get one shade. If it’s not perfect, don’t worry, it will all go on evenly once you wear it.

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At this point you will want to empty all of the contents of your bowl into your pan. I didn’t end up scraping enough contents out of my pallets so I had to add more shadows and of course, more glitter.

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Absolutely beautiful!
Mix together your shadows a little more just to make sure they are even. After this you will want to take the flat side of your knife and even out your powder a little bit so it coats the pan evenly.

You will then want to take your rubbing alcohol to the pan. I put my alcohol into the cap so that I did not add too much. It doesn’t take very much! The more alcohol you add, the longer it will take for your pigment to dry which means it will take longer for you to be able to wear it.

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You will then pour just a little bit of your alcohol into the pan. Remember, you can always add more if needed, so start off small.

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After you have poured in your alcohol, mix the contents together to form a thick paste.

Now we will press our pigment! Grab a round, flat surface (or square if you are using a square pan) and gently push on top of your highlighter. Doing this will press it into the pan and keep the shade from shifting around. It will also even out your pigment so it covers the pan evenly and is also easy to use with a brush.

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After, your highlighter should look like this:

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Hopefully yours looks a little better than mine. Allow the pigment time to dry. Mine only needed about an hour but if you used a lot of alcohol, give it up to 24 hours to form. It should be hard and powdery just like a normal eyeshadow.

Test it out! See how well your new makeup turned out and flaunt what your mama gave ya! Mine turned out flawless and is the best highlighter I have ever used and I didn’t spend a dime on it! Here’s proof of how awesome this how to really is:

The best part about this hack is you can use it for any kind of powder cosmetic. If your bronzer has lost its luster, your blush isn’t the right shade, or if you need a new eyeshadow color for the party you’re attending. This also works if your favorite powder has fallen apart from dropping it or overuse. Just follow the same steps and boom! Just like new. I loved being able to make my own highlighter because I found that no highlighter has enough glitter and now I can add my own. I think I will also be trying this trick with other colors. Blue highlighter? Yellow Bronzer? Why not? The possibilities are endless.

As corny as this whole post is, I love doing work such as this. While it is always important to talk about the things that really matter, my beauty hobbies as well as having the opportunity to try new things is what really gets me out of bed in the morning. I hope you all enjoyed this tutorial as much as I did and let me know if you want to see more content like this.

Much love, Mady

If you don’t have any extra pans you can use right now you can buy some off Amazon for super cheap! You can also create your own custom pallet which is perfect for travel and you’ll always have your most favorite shades on hand.

15 pc eyeshadow pallet $2.78 through Amazon.com
 Single eyeshadow pans 25ct $9.99 through Amazon.com

(If you purchase any of these products I get a little bit of credit which means I can keep posting tutorials like this! Click on the pictures if you are interested in buying.)

Why I stopped using moisturizer and never looked back

Being big into the beauty game, I absolutely love doing my face routine. I wash my face at least once a day and (almost) always remember to take off my makeup. I know at the end of the day that the key to a great face is having great skin. While I try to take very good care of my skin with sensitive soap, the occasional mask, as well as pore strips, I do not use moisturizer.

I recently read an article by Truthinaging.com (Truth in Aging) saying that using moisturizer is actually harmful to your skin. When I first read the article I was just as shocked as you all are. It has been pounded into my mind by beauty bloggers, makeup tutorials, and articles about having perfect skin that you never skip moisturizing.  The gist of the article said that using a moisturizer teaches your skin that it does not need to hydrate itself thus leaving your face even dryer than it was previously. The article also stated that by taking moisturizer out of your routine, your older self will thank you. The longer your skin has to hydrate itself, the better you will look as you age. I know that some of you will be appalled to hear of such a thing but it really does make sense. I have never been a fan of using moisturizer in the first place. It’s hard to remember, it feels like a thick mask on my face and I never felt as though it was doing anything for my skin other than making me feel claustrophobic. Once I read this article I was happy to throw my moisturizer in the trash and let my skin breathe.After just a couple of weeks time, I found my face feeling less heavy and I felt as though my pores were better able to breathe after having so much product in them all the time.

Truthfully, the best things you can do for your skin is to drink a lot of water, eat healthily, and wash your face. Drinking water alone will restore moisture to your skin in ways you would not believe. Along with drinking more water, lowering your caffeine intake can do wonders for the moisture of your skin. I know there are many college students like me who are saying “Yeah right, cut down my caffeine? maybe once I have my degree I will.” A good suggestion for those people is making the switch over to tea. It does have quite a lot of caffeine in it but guess what the main ingredient in tea is? You guessed it, water. Pair your newfound water addiction with a daily cleaning, throw in a face mask once a week and I promise your skin will be feeling beautiful in weeks.

I do however swear by using African black soap. This stuff works miracles I’m not kidding. I’ve had moderate eczema my entire life and this soap cured it. The soap cleared up my patchy, red, skin. It got rid of my blemishes and it doesn’t suck all the moisture out of my face and body. The price is also amazing. You can get a whole pound of this amazing stuff for only 12.95 on Amazon.com. While this might be a little pricey just for some soap, it will last you forever. I bought this exact same product over a year ago and have barely made a dent in it. With this particular product, I do suggest taking a hammer to it and breaking up the pieces so they fit in your shower a little easier. Also, since the product last so long tie it up in a little bag and give it out for gifts. Your friends will thank you for their flawless skin. I will say though that the first couple of times you use it, there will be a slight tingle because the contents of the soap are natural and unrefined so they can burn the first few uses. The pay off is 100% worth it however because this soap changed the way my skin looked and I don’t think I’ll ever look back.

By clicking on this image it will take you directly where you can buy my most loved beauty product.

As far as a moisturizer goes, I’m glad to see it out of my beauty routine. I don’t like slathering on tons of unnecessary products just to fit the mold. While there still are a lot of you who will swear by moisturizing and refuse to take it out of your routine, I can’t say I will be hopping back on the bandwagon anytime soon. Unless the bandwagon says that using moisturizer will make me as rich as the Kardashians, I think I will just have to live without it

Much love, Mady

 

Moisturizers – are they harmful to the skin’s natural hydration – Truth In Aging. (n.d.). Retrieved January 25, 2017, from https://www.truthinaging.com/review/moisturizers-are-they-harmful-to-the-skins-natural-hydration

On: being a woman

While I have tons to say about my vacation, I will be waiting until I get back to post about the whole thing but what I’m writing about today is something I couldn’t go without writing about for another day.

On Saturday I went to the Women’s March in Miami to rally with my sisters and stand up for what I believe in. Now if you started reading this and said to yourself “I’m so sick of all this political stuff” I don’t care. If you are choosing to ignore the world around you and stand behind your wall while the rest of the country is fighting for their rights, go right ahead but I will be here standing up for myself and all the others around me during these treacherous times.

At the women’s march, I saw a lot of incredible people holding clever signs, yelling chants and standing in solidarity as we all fought for our fundamental rights. While we were at the march though, a woman came up to husband and asked why he was there. Before he could get any word in she said to him, “You are part of the problem.” I was appalled and outraged. My husband made his own sign, chanted with the people around him and supported the cause next to five very strong women (me, his mom, his granny, his aunt, and his cousin. All female). This man of mine came out fighting with the rest of us because he cared. So here’s what I have to say to that woman: men are not the problem. Our corrupt government and our new president are the problem and if you have an attitude such as this one, you are also the problem. Now more than ever we should be standing together not drawing ourselves further apart over something as small as gender. You are both here for the same reason so why not fight for what’s actually important instead of shaming others? Spreading hate such as this is not going to bring us together but will tear this country further apart.

My reason for going to the march was not only to support all of my sisters fighting for what they need but also because I have a passion for women’s health. It matters that women will have healthcare available to them now and in the future. The first time I went to get an IUD placed in the doctor had no idea what he was doing and I ended up throwing up in a gas station parking lot after because of the pain I had experienced. The doctor never even got the IUD in place. He just told me to come back in a couple weeks so he could manhandle my uterus again. A few days later I went to Planned Parenthood to get it in place and procedure was quick, not too painful and the doctor that I was seeing treated me like the competent adult that I was, and treated me with only kindness. About a year prior to that I was without insurance and had to go to Planned Parenthood in order to get a pap smear and medication for some very uncomfortable stuff I had going on. While that visit was extremely scary, I have never been taken better care. I have them to thank for my very happy and healthy lady parts. A very good friend of mine worked for Planned Parenthood recently and while the work was grueling, she made a huge difference for women’s health through her work and it is people like her that make sure all women have a safe place to go to get what they need. Even if you are lucky enough to have the care that you need, other women are not so lucky and that is why we need to stand up and make sure that all women have the care that they require.

Being a very privileged white female I have seen the world through a pair of rose covered glasses my entire life. I went to the march for women’s health but I know that other women like me went to these rally’s for all different reasons. Some were fighting for their marriage rights, others were fighting for their daughters’ futures, and some ladies were there to make sure they will be staying in the country. We deserve our rights and we will be sure to make our voices heard. So if you are one of the people who hates seeing things like the marches all over your timeline, you’re going to have a rough next couple years. I know I won’t be standing down and neither should you. If not for yourself, for the younger generations who cannot defend themselves. Also, the next woman who tells me that men are the problem is going to have to answer to me and hell hath no fury like an angry wife.

So here’s to us all standing together. The men standing with us, the confused little girls, the transgender women who are worried they will be without what they need, the women of color facing more slander than they have ever heard, the women who fear their friends, family or even themselves being deported, the women afraid of what will happen to their healthcare, the women who love women afraid if they will be able to marry their partners, the worried mothers, the angry women, the passionate women, the scared women, those women who feel as though their voice doesn’t matter, the trailblazing women, the women out here making their voices heard. In solidarity, I stand with you.

New post!

Hello all! I’m not talking about anything specific today just some random odds and ends. Jack and I leave for Florida in a week! I’m incredibly excited and I cannot wait to spend eight days laying in the sun and having the time of my life with my husband. In celebration of our Disney trip I had a very good friend of mine disneyfy my nails! 

I thought I would give you all an update on our financial journey! I’ve been reading my book but have found it to be very confusing and somewhat hard to focus on. I’ve found all the information to be quite overwhelming until today! Today at church I found out about a finicial program that’s being taught at my church that teaches you to wisely use your money so I of course had to take the opportunity to enroll Jack and I in the program. It’s called Dave Ramsey’s Finiacial Peace University. This is something I’ve never heard of before but I am willing to try anything to get our money figured out. The program comes with a kit full of supplies such as envelopes, a workbook, Dave Ramsey’s book as well as the online course. The program is supposed to be very easy and I can’t wait to get started! We will be starting this a few days after our trip and I’ll be keeping weekly updates about the program to tell you all how it’s going. I hope it goes well! 

Note: it is impossible to keep the cat from getting in my pictures. 

Anyways that’s all I have for this week. My goal for this week will be to save some money and not go spend crazy so I can splurge in Florida! Plus a week of Netflix and eating at home won’t kill me. I’ll be trying to keep a daily update of our trip on this blog so I can post a lot of pictures and make all my friends and family just a little jealous 😜. That’s all for now! 

Much love, Mady 

P.S: on the box set we received it has a place to put a picture of our family so Jack and I took a family picture today and I thought it was super cute so here it is:

On stress:

Woohoo! Two posts in one week. Today I will be talking about stress.

Stress is a funny thing as it doesn’t sound like much but even the word itself, is stressful. In the past few months this word turned my world upside down. In the month prior to getting married, my husband lost his job due to the business closing and had a lot of trouble finding a sustainable job that could even support our monthly Spotify payment. I don’t blame him for it taking so long but it did cause a lot of stress on us as individuals as well as our relationship. Here we were living our lives just fine and dandy but now, we have to pay rent on just a baristas salary. With a small wedding to pay for as well as rent, groceries and bills it all became very hard, very fast. With not having enough money came me having to work more, which also came with being tired all the time, which also came with not getting enough sleep, which eventually came to my immune system getting weaker, which caused me to get sick, which resulted in not being able to work, and don’t forget the ever dreadful finals week. Along with this paired finding energy to work out hard which resulted in, you guessed it, more stress. Also, sometimes all you really want to do is go out for dinner with your husband. So let me break that down for you: Bills + rent + wedding – sleep – working out + sick – money = stress. It’s kind of funny how these things seem to all pair together one way or another. Granted, we did get a lot of very generous wedding gifts, but most of them were spent on essentials like food, toilet paper, and our credit card payment. If you add in a couple of car repairs and the Christmas season all of these incidents can add up to a very stressful couple of months. I’ve heard that after you get married you tend to be on cloud nine but for us that didn’t reign so true. We never got into any fights but it’s very hard to be in a honeymoon phase when you are physically and emotionally exhausted all the time. 

Fast forward to now and things are much better. We have more income, less bills, two working cars to get us to work, a soft and fuzzy cat, and most importantly we finally have time to spend with eachother. While most of our stress was financially based and I know there will be harder times in our marriage, I’m very glad this short period of our lives is finally over. Since all of this stress has ended my life, as well as my husbands’, has become miles better and you can tell just by looking at us. To start off, I have a much clearer head. I am able to logically think without going into a panic over my plan. Without my clouded mind I have been better able to take care of myself as well. I’ve been able to read more, eat better, work out and have spent more time thinking positively and be thankful for all that I have. Now, notice that I said I was able to do these things. I use the word able because I believe that when people get into states such as these, it is nearly impossible for our minds to work in a rational way. It’s almost as though our brains become paralyzed with our stressful thoughts and even though we know better, it can seem impossible to be normal some days. 

Along with this stress-free life, my relationship has become better. We work more as a team, we feel more comfortable talking to each other, and have found more time to just talk. For example; Today while having lunch in my car we had the first real conversation we’ve had without a phone in front of our faces for a long time. 

The best outcome of my stress free life though is that for the first time in months I have been excited. Don’t get me wrong I was very excited to get married but I can be hard to be excited when you’re trying to figure out how to get enough gas to get to the courthouse. To give you an example, tonight I was excited just to go on a date with my husband. We went and got very subpar Italian food and ended up just going home after because the roads were so snowy, but it was awesome to spend some real time with him and it made me endlessly happy. I’m also excited to go on our vacation in a week and not even a little stressed about having enough travel money so huzzah to that! 

I choose to write about this because I found it crazy how much my stress has had an impact on my life in the past few months. The changes I have felt physically, emotionally, and mentally really gave me a good look at what stress has the possibility of doing to you. From this reflection I hope to gain insight to the next time I feel this way and hopefully deal with it in a more healthy and mindful way. It’s hard to say for the future but as of now, I’ve finally hit that honeymoon phase and I hope it never fades away.  

On self esteem:

Lately I’ve been feeling some very low self esteem. Maybe I’m not getting enough sleep or maybe I’m drinking too much caffeine which is making me sensitive but it’s very apparent that something in my life needs to change. 

This is an emotion I’m pretty familiar with. I’m average looking and at least twice a week my weight will fluctuate and it turns my world completely upside down. The self esteem issues don’t just come down to my appearance, however they seem to center more around my whole life in general. Last week one of my closest friends graduated from college as an accounting major and while I am so floored that he had the ability to do so and is starting his life out in the real world, it has made me feel jealous and insecure about my life plan. I don’t have one at the moment and I’ve been in school for 3 years now.in fact, I’m still trying to figure out how to pay my tuition for last semester.

Why does it feel like everyone around you has their life figured out? There are people who do yoga every morning, are working on 2 masters degrees, eat vegan and still manage to do their hair every morning. I can barely remember to wash mine much less wake up early enough to throw in a yoga class. Lately it feels crippling trying to figure out where my life is going. I feel lost and down about myself because I have no plan. 

Money has been a huge part of this as well. I want nothing more than to go on a date night with my husband or buy a new swimsuit for my vacation next month but I feel as though every penny not spent on bills is a huge waste. In reality it probably is but I also want to go out and have a little fun every once in awhile. Not to mention that I absolutely love Christmas shopping for other people and if I had the money I would buy everyone I love their own private island. Alas, I make a baristas wage which is no where close to owning private island timeshares. 

All of these things combined make me feel as though I am not enough. I feel like I’m trying my best but my best is never going to be good enough. Maybe this is because humans have a natural instinct to want to be better or maybe I’m just surrounded my really awesome people. Either way, I need to make a positive change in my life. How though? I could wake up every morning and tell myself how awesome I am. I could find a way to make money on the side, I could start waking up a little earlier and take care of myself but something’s are easier said than done. 

This happens to people all the time. They say “from here on out I’m going to…” sometimes this works out but a lot of the time, your new outlook on life can fade away and you relapse into your old self. How do we change this? We set goals of course. This is a technique I learned in my Zumba class last semester that changed my outlook on goal setting. So here is the way to do it: Start every week with a new goal to improve yourself. For example, “This week I will not spend unnecessary money” and once you have mastered that goal, you will move on to the next. Make these goals small and obtainable and only make them one at a time. If you make several goals at a time it can feel overwhelming and that’s when you crash and burn and are back to square one. These goals can have a tendency to fade over time this is okay and natural but is no excuse to give up. When your goals do start to fade, set a similar goal but not the exact same one. If your goal was to go to the gym five times a week but you fell out of it, start with something similar but just as obtainable. Instead set the goal to go on three runs a week and do at least 2 strength workouts to pair with it. The reason I suggest to not set the same goal is because you are always changing and growing and so should your goals. You are not the same person you were five minutes ago so why would you set goals for your past self? Thinking like this will improve the way you reach your goals and will change your outlook on failing too. You are going to fail sometimes, it’s just the way life is. Sometimes you get knocked on your ass and it’s hard to get back up but, learn from where you are and figure out where you want to be. On that note; don’t wait until the new year to become a better you. The new year is just a day and there’s no reason to procrastinate being better and happier in yourself. 

I will start setting my weekly goals and I’ll even post about them on here for all of you to see! I’ll give you updates on my goals and how they are going and you can give me yours too. My goal I will be starting today is to read at least one finance book to better my understanding of money. What will your goal be? Leave a comment and we can go through this together because everyone knows we are stronger when we have a little support.

Good notes: 

This week my car finally got fixed. Yay! Now I can drive without worrying about how my husband is going to make it home from work. 

Also this week Jack, my siblings and I made homeade gingerbread houses and I made some awesome frosting to go along with them. The cats ended up licking them so we couldn’t really eat them after that but it was still super fun. Here are all of our houses lined up: 

Mine was obviously the best though 💁🏼

You could say frosting is my calling. Speaking of frosting, I also made my little brother a totally awesome birthday cake that looked like a bonfire from Dark Souls. 

This week was a great one and I’m very thankful for the life I have and the people around me. 

If you enjoyed this post please give it a like and post your comment on what goal you will be starting this week is! 

Much love – Mady